Annie Ashdown the resident Life Coach on ITV’s Kyle’s Academy and contributor to Zest, Slim at Home, She and Prima Magazine specialises in confidence building and relationships. Time pressure, stress and other emotional situations can create food demons that drive us to eat…Annie speaks from personal experience about breaking the emotional attachments many people have with food…
Here’s the thing, as we focus on our own happiness and inner strength’s, it is amazing to see and feel the transformation starting to take place within. The feeling of serenity and contentment along a sense of empowerment is profound. When this takes place we can be sure we won’t approach a relationship from a place of insecurity, clinginess, or a deep need to be needed, instead we will come from a place of strength, self respect and high self esteem. This in return will attract healthy people to you who will meet your needs and wants, cherish and value you.
By focusing on your own journey and your own shortcomings, and not pointing the finger of blame at others, you will gain amazing insight and feel more confident as a woman. You will become the ‘master of your own destiny’ and recognise you have choices. Your self respect and self image will triple and this will radically enhance all your relationships.
Keep checking on the site as I will regularly give you tools to enjoy your own life with or without a man and when the time is right my friend, you will be equipped with a set of tools to attract and maintain a healthy loving relationship to enter your life. My golden rule to all you amazing single women is ‘date yourself first’ Make yourself a top priority. Remember we have to look after our most valuable assets. You are your most valuable asset.
Flirting and acting confident is a skill that can be learned and mastered...........
Here’s the thing guys if you don’t feel it right now, then fake it till you make it. Remember it is always progress, not perfection. We are all ‘perfectly imperfect’ and that is more than enough....... Perfectionism is an illusion. You will be waiting forever if you wait to perfect anything.........Remember when you want to master something new it is vital to identify what you hope to accomplish.
Make eye contact and be an effective listener
There is nothing more flattering than someone truly listening to you and looking you in the eye. By doing this it will signify you are integral and honest, not a flaky woman, and that you are someone who can hold a two way conversation. I hated going out with anyone who spoke about themselves as it got in the way of me talking about myself!! Ha ha, if I can change, so can you.
Smile
Again this is something that is very appealing. It puts the other person at ease and also shows you have a warm heart and a giving nature. My father used to always say ‘if someone doesn’t have a smile, give them yours’ It is very engaging and will certainly ease you both when on a date.
Be playful
Yes it is always great to be flexible with conversation and show you have the ability to discuss serious issues, however this is a date, not an interview for the economist, and so please guys, keep it light. Take the date seriously if you like, but take yourself lightly......... No sarcasm, moaning or gossiping or getting heavy and mistaking him for a therapist!!
Ask him about himself
Yes we know all females are Gorgeous Divine Godesses, but Hello, this is not only about us, there are two people on the date. Get your ego out of the way please..... Get over yourself. Show him you are interested in what he has to say and who he is. Be genuine or else call a stop to the date. Also in order to invest time and energy in any relationship, don’t we first have to know what/who we are investing in?
Reveal something unique about yourself
Yeah you heard it right, something, not everything or nothing..........There is a huge difference between ‘being revealing and being honest’. You are not a daily newspaper for anyone to pick up and put down when they fancy it. Neither can you expect someone to be able to become intimate with you, if you rehearse to be someone else and not expose any of yourself. Remember however you are not auditioning for a show, keep it real. This is about humility, not arrogance, quit showing off, it will turn him right off. Don’t think for a moment people can’t see straight through that fake behaviour.
Pay attention to your body language
This is crucial. Did you know that 7% of communication is verbal and 93% is non verbal? OK now that you do, remember if you are sitting down, keep your legs crossed and pointed towards him ( if you like him). Match his body and communication, so you align your body and mind with his. However make sure you don’t forget your own individuality, this is not about copying him or impressing him. Do please keep in mind actions literally speak louder than words.